I put her down for the night and a a few minutes later she started screaming. I try to be a good mother so I ran to her, did the comforting scoop up and nuzzle and set about seeing what was the problem. "A shadow! A shadow!" she managed to screech around her terrified gasps. I looked at the wall and there was her silhouette smashed up against mine. It took me almost 45 minutes to calm her down. I was almost fed up with her other fears:
~ stinkbugs
~ladybugs
~hair washing
~dogs
~cars
~diaper changes
~does daddy miss her when he's away?
~not touching me every moment of the day
~etcetera, etcetera, etcetera (<-please read this in the way king in 'The King and I' said it. It's just better)
But in the (very lengthy) time it took me to comfort her I think I had a few breakthroughs in my own heart about how I can best deal with her. A few words kept swimming through my head.
#1: Be slow to anger.
I need that. The first few upsets of a day I can handle but by bedtime I'm just thinking (and occasionally saying) "Would you just shut up already?!" Lots of praying for me to be a more patient mommy. I make my kids pray for that too. It helps us understand each other if we pray for our faults together (or I like to think so at least)
#2: Be anxious for nothing, but in everything give thanks.
This is the direction in which I felt I should urge my daughter. I laid next to her reminding her of everything she has in her life for which she can be thankful. From a good brother who flushes stink bugs for her, to a daddy that treasures her, to warm socks and yummy cheese. Seriously everything I could think of. She slowly relaxed, but took a bit of coaxing for her to be okay with me leaving.
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